Trauma

If you look at her you'd never know the pain 

You'd never know that at 8 years old she woke up to her uncles hands fondling her body

Or that at 5 she witnessed her fathers adulterous acts with her aunt

You wouldn't know that at 13 the molestation turned into full blown sexual assault 

Or at 12 she was forced to lose her virginity

You wouldn't know that at 10 her mother told her she would never love her because she was her fathers child

Or at 9 she was forced to become a second parent to her younger siblings 

And that ever since then she never really understood what it felt like to be a kid

You wouldn't know that at 15 she dealt with losing a child alone because who else could she tell?

You wouldn't know what it feels like to spend your whole life pushing people away 

To keep yourself from getting emotionally attached 

And then finally when you're ready to love you don't know how to

How do you love someone if you've never seen it?

How do you know what's real? 

How can I show you how I really feel?

4/6/15- Laura Leslie