Skip to main content

Living

Every morning I wake up and have one moment of pure bliss
One very short moment of happiness
A moment where everything is the way it’s supposed to be
But then I remember
I remember every bad thing that has happened 
I remember that you’re gone 
I remember the reasons we broke up
I remember the stress from the night before
From a few weeks
Shit, from the future
I remember my trauma
Sometimes, I even have flashbacks
I remember that where I am at today is the result of my own choices
Choices I made based on the circumstance I was in
The head space
The pressure
The potential
Choices I made because I thought I knew what was best
I also remember the good moments
The happy-exciting-super fucking fabulous moments
And I smile
Then I cry
Because the pain is still there.
I can’t wait to wake up one morning and revel in the blissful moment
I can’t wait until that short moment because a long moment
Which then becomes a familiar feeling
And then before I know it,
The pain has subsided and I’m living again
I’m actually fucking living
I can’t wait to live again.
I just want to fucking live again


Renacidas Laura

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

I JUST WANT TO KNOW WHY

I just want to know what does love mean to you? I’m not entirely sure if means the same to me.  I just want you to want me the way that I want you I want you to want me like you used to  I just want you to ask me about my day?  You know, make sure I’m okay.  I just want to know that this is real I need to know that you feel what I feel  I just want to kiss your face and hear your voice But every time I wanna see you, you act like the plans you made weren’t by choice  I just want to know what you want What the fuck do you want?  I just want to know what are we doing?  Where are we going? Is THIS going anywhere?  I just want to know why?  Why do you keep doing this to me?  Why do you tell me you love me?  Why do you tell me you want to be with me?  Why?  I just want to ask you to leave me alone  To block me on your phone.   Please, block me on your...
Post a Comment
Read more

Differences

The worst part about us not all being raised the same is that We’re not all raised the same. I know it sounds stupid I know you’re thinking, duh why would we want to be alike? Our differences make us unique Helps us stand out from each other But what about the differences that make or break things? Different values Upbringings Core beliefs Different expectations of life of each other? And the things they can break Oh the things they can break Friendships Trust Relationships Promises So many things But I can only think about the things they broke for me I can only think about the fact that my whole life I was taught that hard work is the key and working is never a question And that he was taught that a job will come when it comes and we’ll eventually be okay I can only think about the fact that I was raised on love and the important of family while he He was raised around people who only worried about themselves People who would turn their backs when you needed t...
Post a Comment
Read more